Before you send me hate mail or douse my car with Pumptinis, please know, I still love everything about Vanderpump Rules. I decided to step out of my element and share my story anyway for two reasons: 1.) Everyone was curious about it and 2.) Not everything always goes as planned and Monday could have been an off-night. I’m still planning on trying Villa Blanca one day and might even give SUR another shot!
OK JetSetters, I’m just going to cut to the chase and start this off by letting you know this post was very difficult one for me to write. Those of you who have followed our JSF journey for the last decade or so know first hand I only feature people, places + restaurants that are considered to be one of my favorites attached with glowing reviews. Sadly, a wee piece of my Bravo TV groupie heart was broken the other night because my experience at Lisa Vanderpump’s SUR Restaurant was less than perfect and about as painful as watching Lisa Rinna get waxed.
Before I touch down on the nitty gritty, I do want to take a moment to mention our server, Adam. He was absolutely wonderful and saved the night in many ways. Everything about him was enjoyable, funny and I highly recommend requesting to be seated in his section should you find yourself making a reservation for dinner at SUR. At one point in the evening he even served us “flan with a side of Peter” which was an extremely sweet (and hysterical) gesture because you know how I love my Bravolebrity selfies! So thank you, Adam!
SUR is small. As in tinier than James. It’s the size of what I wish my waist measured. When the venue is featured on Bravo’s hit TV show, Vanderpump Rules and even based on the photos on the official website, it looks much more fluid and open spaced than it really is. Which really shouldn’t be an issue, but the tables are positioned very close together, and like Kristen’s relationships, not one of them seemed to be sturdy or stable. Every single one around us was wobbly and this became a bit annoying because each party had to have their servers crawl underneath to fix the rocking while bumping (insert your favorite Jax Taylor pun here) into someone else’s seat due to the close proximity.
Then there was the tunes. Let’s keep this between you and I shall we? I really hope the grooves filling the dining room air are not on the upcoming Pump CD that James keeps touting (remember his pout on the reunion because Andy Cohen didn’t mention it?) The vibe was really choppy. One minute you felt like you were back at Buddah Bar which which was cool and matched flow of the decor, but before you knew it, the next song dropped, I found myself thinking, “Is this an EDM version of Ethel Merman?” But, hey, there is a bright side, if they are the same tracks, LVP can recycle all the unsold discs to fix the shoddy table issues mentioned above instead of using matchbooks.
And the food. Let’s just say, you can tell by my Instagram how the food was. For someone who can’t wait to share real time behind-the-scenes escapades there is not one single photo of the evening. Which to me is heartbreaking. I was so excited to write about the restaurant here, and on CBS Los Angeles and Huffington Post. Not to mention blast photos like a hardcore Bravo groupie all over Facebook, Twitter and IG, but it’s really too dark for any good photos and it was lacking presentation as well.
Sadly, someone better tell Stassi (whom I just heard from Wendy of Long Story Short has a killer podcast,) her favorite Fried Goat Cheese Balls were more like rock hard fried goat balls minus the cheese. Nothing we ordered even wow’d me in the presentation department. Friends, I couldn’t even smoke & mirror this meal with fancy filters. Le sigh.
Someone at our table did order a glass of the Finca Molina Malbec and I really loved it. Truthfully, I would go back just for that and to simply watch every diner stop what they were doing and snap their heads up in unison the moment anyone walked thru the door. It was pure comedy. I swear by the end of the night half of the patrons had whiplash.
It pains me like no other to say this, but on the way home I compared it to “the Hard Rock Cafe franchise for Bravo TV.” For the record, I’m refusing to believe Villa Blanca is like this because the last thing I want is for all of my LVP dreams to go up in flames like that Ariana “A” tattoo on Tom Sandoval’s butt.
Before the drive up that day, I was asked a lot who I was most excited to see. Well from what I understand, when they are not taping, only one VPR cast member is usually on the schedule, but I’m not sure how much truth there is to that.
I’ve actually seen quite a few Vanderpump Rules sightings in the wild over the last few months and I wasn’t even on a stalking mission. Last month, my family rode the elevator with “The Toms” Sandoval and Schwartz (which was such a trip in itself, talk about hysterical;) then I had seen Lisa Vanderpump and Ken Todd at Odysseyo, and Scheana and Katie at a GRAMMY gifting suite, so who else is left? Let’s see, there’s hot Peter, Jax who kind of scares me in that Dave Navarro kind of way, LaLa Kent, Ariana and James.
I got my wish as Peter was there and happy to take photos with anyone who would like one. Which was a really nice gesture in a town where this request can get real old, real fast. Thank you, Peter. Your kindness is appreciated.
On the bright side we had fun together and our server made me really happy so go and request him soon because it’s only a matter of time before someone snatches that dude’s butt right up.